You are pushed to the utter limits of your emotional and physical tolerance until you can no longer carry the weight. Here, in this small space pushed up against an invisible wall, is where you finally stop resisting and succumb to the realization that you must stop and surrender.
I asked several people what it means to surrender. Here’s what they said:
- Allowing
- Let go and let God
- Stop resisting
- To Give Up
- Adoption
- Resignation
- To lose
- To relinquish a victory, knowing your opponent is the true winner.
- That I am not a river, but a canoe without a rudder.
Surrendering is a very individual experience, and each time we surrender, our perception influences how we experience it. For example, surrendering to the restrictions of COVID-19 might bring about resistance and anger if your business is going bankrupt versus someone who chooses to stay quarantined due to a pre-existing condition. Both people embody surrendering on a cellular level, but one resists it while the other embraces it.
How we perceive surrendering depends on the juxtaposition of affliction and consequences. One who surrenders to an addiction to alcohol might endure the struggle on a visceral level.
Perhaps, you’ve lost your job, and now you must surrender to the financial and emotional consequences.
We are all surrendering on some level to the wrath of COVID-19; it is a worldwide phenomenon. How can we surrender with self-compassion? Here are some mindful tools to help you cope:
Grounding
“To the mind that is still, the whole universe surrenders.” — Lao Tzu
Breathing: Box breathing is a simple yet highly effective technique when you feel yourself becoming stressed or panicky.
YouTube: Guided Box Breathing Video
Shake it out: Close your eyes and notice where in your body you are holding stress. Stand up and shake it out of your body, hit a pillow, jump up and down and move until you feel it release.
Scents: Our olfactory system has the power to change our mood. Try a scented candle, essential oils, flowers, etc.
Sounds: Listen to music or nature sounds. Humming releases oxytocin in the body and is a beautiful self-soothing technique.
Cognitive and Creative
Victor Frankl, who wrote Man’s Search for Meaning, believed that suffering is a part of the human experience, and our most valuable quality is to make choices, and that our choices provide meaning in our life. We can implement this ideology with how we choose to surrender.
Reframe your situation and choose to see it differently.
Find innovative ways to adjust and adapt to the “new normal.”
Be of Service
Thinking and giving to others takes one out of oneself and delivers back to you in spades.
“The moment of surrender is not when life is over, it’s when it begins.” — Marianne Williamson